Grow Up Santa

Merry Christmas Michael

Ho ! Ho! Ho! I was just checking my list for the second time and sure enough, there your name is on the naughty side. Wow, have you been bad this year! I can’t believe some of the mischief you’ve been up to.

Before I double-checked the list, I was thinking of bringing you something very nice, but now I think a stocking full of coal is just the thing for you.

If you hear a bump on your roof on Christmas Eve, don’t investigate. It’s just me, bringing your coal. Also, don’t think I can’t make it past the burglar alarm. They don’t call Christmas “magical” for nothing.

I hope you can pull it together and clean up your act for next year. This is so disappointing for me. I remember you were a good little child, and look at you now.

Perhaps you can redeem yourself by leaving me some milk and cookies. And when I say milk, I mean a glass of wine, and when I say cookies I mean, well, cookies.

Sincerely